In the West, the death and dying process was
popularized by psychiatrist, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, MD in
her book, On Death and Dying In this book Kubler-Ross
postulates that the dying person goes through five stages
of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.
Originally, these stages were viewed as a linear process and
in order to have a peaceful death, one must go through all
the stages. Many years later, Kubler-Ross realized that emotions
experienced during the dying and grieving process are not
necessarily linear and not everyone goes through all the stages.
Recent studies support her conclusion and in
fact, have found that grief is often a messy, unpredictable
process that ebbs and flows. Additionally, everyone's grief
process is different. Some people may feel angry and depressed,
while other people may feel relieved and peaceful, especially
if their loved one had a prolonged illness.
There is no "right" or "wrong" way to grieve,
but typical feelings and symptoms can include, not only denial,
anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance, but physical
symptoms as well, such as decreased sleep, decreased appetite,
increased levels of stress hormones such as cortisol, weakened
immune systems; feeling restless; and heart palpitations.
It is also not unusual for mourners to talk
out loud to their deceased loved one and to constantly be
"seeking" something they can't quite put their hands on. Preoccupation
with the deceased loved one is common and some times people
see their deceased loved one in person or through dreams.
Some times people feel their loved one is communicating with
them through animals or other "signs." All these feelings
and symptoms are normal for someone experiencing grief.
Recent studies also show that "normal" grief
typically peaks after six months, but can continue for at
least two years. Grief often comes in waves of emotions, followed
by periods of feeling peaceful.
Additionally, there are many types of grief.
Grief is not limited to the death of a loved one. You can
mourn the loss of other things such as a pet, a relationship,
your physical or mental health, financial status or job. Grief
can take many forms. Whatever form your grief takes, Dr. Bailey
can help you through the difficult times. Through her guidance
and support, you will not feel alone on your journey.
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